My Coworker

Is Almost As Crazy As I Am

My coworker, God love her, is going through a divorce after being with the same man for 33+ years. Truly, I have watched her suffer. About a month ago, I walked into her cubical and said, "I cannot understand how you're handling this so well. I was only with my ex for 2 years and 4 months. My melon's so twisted, I have to go to therapy." I guess I planted a seed because she then asked for my therapist's information. She's been seeing her ever since. (I do believe it's helping) 

Today, we finished lunch out at our favorite Mexican Restaurant and drove to the post office since I had a small package to mail. As we were walking in, she said, "You're going to kill me when I tell you this."

"Go ahead", I responded.

"Well, you know Ben came by last night and it hit me really hard. I started asking questions about the "lady" he has been seeing. It seems she has separated from her husband as well. I asked if he has been going out with her and he said "no". The implication was that he did not have the MONEY to take her out. I was tempted to give him some so he could go on a date with her."

"Get out of this line now!!!!!!, I yelped. "Or I will beat you right here in front of all these people."

"Well, I didn't actually do it", she said.

"GO write the therapist and confess your sins. You have been a very BAD girl!!" Naturally she refused.

Later, back in the office, I told her she should have pulled THREE dollars out of her purse and told her "soon to be ex" to take the Boink Girl out for Ice Cream. I continued my harassment for quite some time and then explained I was RAGGING on her because I get the same kind of thoughts towards my ex. What in the hell is wrong with us?

Signing Off,

The Double Standard Angry Lesbian
04/20/06